Expensive World Series

Crazy Sports Parents get even crazier as the stakes get raised. Parents in Auburn, Washington (near my hometown) are forking over cash by the bucketloads to see their kids play in the Little League World Series in Pennsylvania.

From the outside, this looks a little nuts to spend this kind of cash on youth sports, but when it's your kid and their possible once-in-a-lifetime shot at something this big, it not only becomes reasonable, it becomes hard to not spend the money. American youth sports makes its participants and their parents a little nuts.

Tryouts, Ins and Outs

Cutting kids because the parents are crazy?! Because the mom is hot?! Jeff Seidel at Detroit Free Press shines a light on the sleazy underbelly of youth sports tryouts.

The Biggest CSP of Them All

I believe Kim Jung Il is of the Great Father ilk of mad dictator, so his punishment of the North Korean soccer team and its coach qualifies as our all-time craziest Crazy Soccer Parent moment.

Hello, FIFA. Don't you disband national FAs for crap like this?!

Soccer Parent Newbies, So Cute!

I spent some time Friday afternoon volunteering on the sidelines for the local soccer club at a rec soccer tournament. I had two U11-U12 games and the soccer parents were just hilarious. Each game I saw was as important as the World Cup final itself! Each play a referendum on whether the girls wanted the victory enough and a statement on their inherent worth (or their parents).

The parents shouted out instructions as if the kids were interested, let alone could react in real-time to the Shoot-Pass-Win the Ball shouts.

Another veteran soccer dad sat near me and we had some fun listening to the parents. By the time you get to our level of experience, hundreds of games, thousands of road and air miles, tournaments and league games in every podunk town and suburb in a 3 thousand mile radius of home, you realize that it's best to just chill out and enjoy the game. Or talk to your friends and ignore the game.

Some day these parents will understand (or their kids will burn out before they do).

Naughty Soccer Mom

Stealing from kids. Really?! I guess you got to fix that ebay habit somehow.

My Favorite Parent

Ok, so we've got some rotten apples in this bunch of parents, but there's one guy who stands out. His daughter has been injured and out all season, so I haven't seen him for most of the year. However, as the team advanced through the state tournament he began showing up at games.

At this particular game that he was at, my wife had the misfortune of standing next to him. I was at my other daughter's game so I got this stuff in the post-game report (probably a good thing I wasn't there).

The team was having a difficult time establishing a rhythm and according to my report, the girls weren't running very hard or challenging on posession. The boo birds in our group began whining and whinging about the girls' play and yelling at them.

This fellow who had been monologuing on how he was a youth coach in another sport, as well as a referee, and I guess, an all-around genius, began commenting loudly on the play of the forwards, which is where my daughter plays.

He then began criticizing my daughter's lack of running, and loudly enough for my wife to hear. (Now, keep in mind that my daughter's injury had re-occurred and was affecting her ability to run). My wife asked him to repeat his comments, which he declined. He then said under his breath, but loud enough to be heard, that my daughter was lazy.

What a prince! A real class act. Last time I checked this was still youth soccer, involving young people who deserve only our support and encouragement, not criticism and negativity. I understand that some adults carry around a lot of negative emotional problems. They need to seek counseling, not project that onto 15 and 16-year-old girls.

Fairweather Parents

So, my DD has been out of action most of the season due to injury. She comes back (after a month of hard work on her part in physical therapy, and attending most of the training sessions, even though she couldn't participate). The coaches insert her in the game with about 10 minutes left in the first half and guess what, she's slow, she's not in a rhythm, she is playing tentatively.

So, the group of negative CSPs from our sideline start groaning and yelling things like, "forwards have to run to the ball," and "challenge for the ball." The talk gets specific enough that I decide to leave the stands and find a neutral site to sit at. It's either that or create a scene in the stands.

Consequently, I don't hear anything else for the rest of the game (and am happy about that!). In the 2nd half as my daughter (and her teammates) find their way into the game and establish a rhythm, my daughter makes a great run through the middle, and in trying to get a shot off collides with a defender and the keeper, going down in a heap, but managing to pass the ball off for an assist on the tying goal. She then gets a few more good opportunities before nailing the winning goal. All in all, a good game for her first game in over two months.

And the critical CSPs? They cheer her, of course. Now, it's "great game!" and slaps on the back. What a bunch of hypocrites. And this isn't lost on the players. They know they've got a bunch of parents who back them completely when things are going good, but will throw them under the bus when they're struggling.

Frustrating Sidelines

I typically don't post about my own sidelines for obvious reasons, but yesterday's game was terrifically frustrating. we're new on the team and I don't know many parents. I started out sitting in the stands next to a guy I know, and like; a reasonable soccer dad such as myself.

As the game started, our team was not playing well. Girls were standing too much, not challenging for possession, not supporting other players. We made a team from a lower division look like the state champions in the first half. Eventually, they scored on us and it was 1-0 halftime.

But, boy, did some of the parents let the team know what time it was! 10 or so minutes in and several of the parents were yelling, "You gotta run for it." "You gotta challenge the ball" "Come on forwards, get into the game!" All manner of helpful instruction was offered and in that CSP tone of voice that tells players how much they're sucking on the field and destroying the entire history of the game with their play.

As the half went on, the supportive cheers dwindled and the harping and moaning increased. Fortunately, the ref was incompetent and inconsistent, so he drew some of the parents' ire away from their own daughters.

Now my daughter has been out injured for 2 months. She hasn't played a game for 2 months. The coaches put her into the game (as a forward) with 5 minutes in the half. This is obviously time for her to warm up, get into the flow of the game, and hopefully prepare to play a substantive role in the 2nd half. I doubt the coaches expected her to light the field up and shred defenders in those 5 minutes.

CSPs fortunately know better. "Come on! Challenge for the ball!" "Forwards have to run for it!", etc. At this point, I was tempted to ask the main cheerleader for his daughter's number so that I could provide positive commentary to her as well. Instead, I got up and went to the other side of the stadium to watch the game in isolation.

Here's what happened. The team came out renewed in the 2nd half and dominated. My daughter played well along with the other girls on the field. She assisted one goal and scored the winner. When the coach subbed her off, she got a warm round of applause, which both her and I thought was ironic, to say the least.

CSPs who get negative and vocal don't help the team play better. Probably the opposite, though I'm sure their daughters have largely tuned them out. These games are 80 minute dramas. Parents need to support the players throughout, provide encouragement and appreciation, not reveal their inner emotional needs to the world.

I won't make the mistake of sitting in the stands anymore.

Pistol-Packing Pops

Thank God this loser didn't pull the trigger. I've disagreed with my kids' coaches before, but geesh, come on.

Pistol-Packing (Crazy Soccer) Mama!

Lapse of judgement. One little lapse of judgement.

Lace 'em Up, Crack-Boy!

Wow. 2 tournaments in 2 weekends and not much in the way of bad CSP behavior. The worst CSP spotting happened today. While waiting for my daughter's game, I was watching a team thrash another team. When the 6th goal was scored - by a girl who had hit a hat trick - a father in the stands yelled at the top of his lungs, in a deep "Ready to Rummmmmble" voice: "The Princess of Pow!"

It was one of the most embarrassing things I've heard a parent say on the sidelines.

We did get to experience one crazy soccer coach last weekend. After my daughter's team beat up on his team 9-0, in a tick-tacky game in which their keeper got red carded, the other team's coach challenged my daughter's coach to lace up his boots and play a one-on-one soccer game to see which coach knew more about soccer. Huh?? What crack are you smoking, son?

Train 'em To Be Sane

Here's a good article in Crosscut about how to not be a CSP. Training parents? There's a novel idea!

From the Land of Lots of Lakes, more training for parents.

It's Been Awhile

It's been awhile since the CSPs have shown their ugly heads. Here's a substantive article about CSPs to compensate.

Bottom 10 Sports Moments of 2007

It's been awhile since I've posted anything. The CSPs have been behaving themselves...or waiting for warmer weather to display their shenanigans. Anyhow, the Positive Coaching Alliance has released its Bottom 10/top 10 Sports Moments for 2007. Several of our CSPs and CSCs have made the list  (The bottom list, that is).

Let's resolve to do better in 2008, parents.

Crazy Soccer Parent of the Week!

This is one sick, rage-filled soccer mom. Thank God, she wasn't packing heat. Smacks a 68-year-old man upside the head with a chair.

Another coach in the league "said he was concerned about
parent-on-coach violence in the realm of youth sports, but he has
regrettably come to expect it."

"You get one of these parents on every team," he said. "She sounds like she went a little crazy.

Really? I've been involved in youth sports for 7 years. I have yet to see a coach smackdown.

From the past Weekend

From this weekend's game: one of our defenders scored an own goal. Sometime after that my daughter heard one of the opposing team's parents yelling (and then laughing, apparently, at their brilliant wit) for the team "to score one of your own now."

Granted this may seem like a relatively minor CSP crime, particularly given some of the other things reported on this site. However, my daughter was clear that this was not meant in the spirit of sportsmanship.

I never cheer for another team's own goals. These are kids and scoring an own goal sucks. I've done it and it never feels good. Adults should just let own goals go unremarked.

Beat on the Coach

Yes, the coaches sometimes make mistakes. This baseball dad and his baseball-lovin' bro believe in tough love for coaches.

Walk Out

This is a good one. After a stream of negative comments about their soccer player kid, these parents walked out of a high school soccer game in disgust.

Bad Grandparents

Not too much to report in Crazy Soccer Parent doings lately, so I'll treat readers with this story from China about grandparents who desperately wanted a boy. No word on whether they're soccer fans or not.

Beserk Soccer Mom of the Week

This one really goes against all of my naive American perceptions of the Canadians as peaceful and non-violent.

You have to hand it to this crazy mom. She not only lost it, she got an off-duty cop and her husband involved in the fracas. Perhaps, if she tried a wee bit harder she could've incited an all-out sideline soccer brawl.